Dog Food

Dog Food

So, I’m at Wal-Mart today buying a bag of dog food for my dog. While in the check-out line, a woman behind me asked if I had a dog. Why else would I be buying dog food, RIGHT???

So on impulse, I told her no, I was starting the dog food diet again, and that I probably shouldn’t because I ended up in the hospital last time, but that I’d lost 50 pounds before I awoke in intensive care with tubes coming out of every orifice and IVs in both arms.

I told her it was essentially a Perfect Diet and all you do is load your pockets with dog food nuggets and simply eat a few every time you feel hungry. The food is nutritionally complete so it works well and I was going to try it again. (I have to mention here that practically everyone in line was now enthralled with my story.)

Horrified, she asked if I ended up in intensive care because the dog food poisoned me. I told her no, I stopped to lick myself and a car hit me.

I thought the guy behind her was going to have a heart attack he was laughing so hard. Better watch what you ask me and be prepared for my answer. I have all the time in the world to think of crazy things to say.

Now if you believe this story you must believe you can buy ocean front property in Arizona.

Advertisements

Image

4 Comments (+add yours?)

  1. Heartafire
    May 18, 2014 @ 13:00:18

    I have found this diet works just by filling ones pockets and walking a mile everyday. Hilarious article, thank you for the big smile!

    Reply

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s

Upcoming Events

No upcoming events

May 2014
M T W T F S S
« Apr   Jun »
 1234
567891011
12131415161718
19202122232425
262728293031  

Courage Times Three

1-202-555-1212
Lunch: 11am - 2pm
Dinner: M-Th 5pm - 11pm, Fri-Sat:5pm - 1am

Hours & Info

1-202-555-1212
Lunch: 11am - 2pm
Dinner: M-Th 5pm - 11pm, Fri-Sat:5pm - 1am
%d bloggers like this: